Being Honorable

Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.

Exodus 20:12 NIV

Anyone who attacks their father or mother is to be put to death... Anyone who curses their father or mother is to be put to death.

Exodus 21:15,17 NIV

I have to tell you that one of the things that I see in society today that I find most alarming is the incredible lack of respect people generally have for each other. As and educator I see it everyday. Sometimes parents come in to discuss an issue concerning their son or daughter and the interaction between parent and child is as if two adults or two children were talking with each other. The child does not honor their parent and the parent, frankly, is not honorable in front of their child. When a child believes they have an equal position in the relationship then their extremely limited, immature and inexperienced point of view becomes the focal point of any issue. That is a formula for failure.

OK, I'm king of going off here, but, I believe that much of the problems in society today have their root problem in the break down of the family unit. God, as our Creator, set up the family as a foundational part of society. When someone knows how to honor their parents they understand that everyone has a place, important and valuable but not supreme (that is God's place alone). In life we all move from being children who are taken care of by their parents to adults who take care of their parents as they get older. As a child I was to obey my parents in the Lord. As an adult I (when the time comes) take care of my parents. Both actions honor them. 

Showing honor and being honorable are two sides of the same coin. But it starts when we teach our children to honor us. We teach them how to communicate, how to relate, how to express themselves even when they believe they are wronged, and how to trust God even when they can't see the end from the beginning. And that brings us the bottom line: Honoring your parents, honors God. My prayer is that you and I teach our children, by example and instruction, to show honor and be honorable.

ARE YOU FREE TO JUMP OFF A BUILDING?

Live as free people, but do not use your freedom as a cover-up for evil; live as God’s slaves. Show proper respect to everyone, love the family of believers, fear God, honor the emperor.

1 Peter 2:16-17 (NIV)

Being free is an interesting proposition. Does it mean being free to do anything? No, because I could freely choose to jump off the tallest building in downtown LA, but with out a parachute, I'd just die. Freedom does mean thoughtlessness or lawlessness. As a Christian, I am free from sin to serve God which means to live as I was created to live. 

Peter immediately speaks of respect. I have worked in some pretty tough neighborhoods and respect is a big thing, especially among boys and men. For many people respect is more like fear, just fear. But respect is not one person being afraid of another person doing something foolish and hurting them. That is just being afraid of someones lack of self-control displayed in a violent act. Respect is beyond treating someone as you would want them to treat you (also known as the golden rule). Respect is treating someone as a fellow child of God, created in his image. Respect is treating someone as Christ would treat them and remembering that Jesus died for them, just as he died for you. That is godly respect. That is true respect.  

So, freely live, freely love and freely respect all who God puts before you.

Lord, help us to love and respect everyone, even those who don't love and respect us. Praise be to you in us today!

RESPECTABILITY: I Timothy 3:8

Respect is often misunderstood in our culture, I think. For some it means fear. For some it means to be blindly given or received. I think respect has many facets. Respect is both given and earned. I respect someone who does what they say and considers the needs of others, not just their own. I think respectability is a trait every Christian should desire.

"Deacons, likewise, are to be men worthy of respect, sincere, not indulging in wine, and not pursuing dishonest gain." I Timothy 3:8

In this verse Paul is describing men who act honorably and their character proves them to be respectable. I will show respect to some people because it is the right thing to do even though some do not act in a way that warrants respect. This verse is dealing with men whose actions show them to be worthy of respect. 

As for us the question is do I act honorably? Do people respect me? I know that sounds like a bit of an egocentric question, but, I think it is a good question to ask ourselves. Do my wife and children respect me? Do they respect me or do they simply show me respect? Do I do what I say? Am I a man of action? 

I don't mean to condemn in any way, because all of us fall short of the glory of God, but, I do want us to take an honest look at ourselves. If I am not acting respectably I need to change. 

How can you act today that will be worthy of respect?

Father, by your power and grace, make us people worthy of respect. Praise be to you in us today!

WELCOME WITH RESPECT: I Timothy 3:2

People will listen to a man or woman of experience. When Phil Jackson first became the Lakers head coach he showed Shaq his NBA championship rings. Shaq respected that his new coach knew what it took to be a champion. 

"Now an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of but one wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach". I Timothy 3:2

Respect is a very important word for me. I want my wife and children to respect me. As a leader for my son's Cub Scout Pack and coach for some of his sports teams I need to be respectable. I need to be a man of my word. I think respect has to do with both actions and attitude. If I do my job with skill, that is respectable. We had parent conferences last week at the school I teach at. When I great parents I always try to address them as Ma'am or Sir. That instantly tells them I respect them. I don't care what they look like or where they come from when I address them with respect, they almost always treat me with respect. 

Being hospitable is very much in tune with being respectable. Because being hospitable is able how you treat someone. Making others feel comfortable and welcome is not just about having people over for dinner. Jesus told us to be the servant. Putting other peoples needs before out own is definitely Christlike. I think it is hospitable. And I don't think you need to be an overseer in the church to be hospitable. 

One little aside. I have been to and a part of a few churches. Some are more hospitable than others. Sometimes churches have little times for people to great each other. It is easy to find someone you know but, maybe finding a guest and making them feel welcome would be a great little ministry.

Father, help us to be respectable and hospitable. Praise be to you in us today!